Letter #3 - Who de hell I am and what I am doin`

I decided to try again and write in English. My proficiency in English is not perfect, not even close, but I still want to give it a try, since the audience of Hebrew readers will never give me the traffic and exposure which I desire.

In short, my name is Tal, 31 years old, Israeli citizen, who decided to break through the Matrix glazed ceiling and make it abroad. I have a Master of Science (M.Sc.) degree in Atmospheric Science, from the Hebrew University of Jerusalem, Israel.

On the VIP bus from Bangkok to Chiang Mai

I am now staying in Chiang Mai, Thailand, 10 days now, after spending 45 days in India, mostly in Dharamsala of Himachal Pradesh of northern India.

I am working online, especially with Hebrew writing and some English-Hebrew translations, trying to fulfill a new dream of me: travelling and working, or: travelling while working, or the other way round.

My story is quite common; it is regarding the fact that I've been fed up of this box of standard job and employment:

•Having a "physical" boss

•Working in a company

•Working in an office

•Working 9 to 17.5 (in Israel they usually somehow add this 0.5 hour)

•That wearing route of getting to work every morning, with this need to be constantly adjusted to the interactions between the employees, while there is no other choice, than gets along with each and everyone, obligatory.

Actually I haven't gained that great amount of experience working in an office jobs; although I worked in a small "environmental consultancy" company, and then in another one (the "environmental consultancy" industry, like other industries, aim to make earnings of different building projects, road construction, etc., but –

I assume that the common denominator of most of jobs I did is that after a while, I just got, well… bored. I just had itchy feet to stand up and leave.

There are a few possible reasons that I could think of, which may include:

•My inability to be invested in those projects, perhaps since they were never really mine, but some other people's "babies".

•Regarding the previous point, and in addition to it, I felt that I was working for someone else (which is true for most of us, I guess, also when related to the managers and directors among us).

This disconnection to a project was followed by a growing sense of insignificance, which could sometimes be titled us boredom.

Working at the "Black Canyon Coffee"
in the old city of Chiang Ma

I reckon that many people, before reaching that stage, are successful adjusting some kind of investment in what they do, either our of a real interest, or out of lack of other choices, trying to integrate with the work, since "we must make a living", "this is life", or any other reasons. However, I have no intention to be judgmental.

Alright… so where were we?

I think that in the last few years I've been looking for that thing in which I can be fully immersed. When I meet something that looks potential, I give it a try, and when found incompatible, I stand up and leave. I also read plenty of material about people who "have done it" what is that "it" exactly? As far as I'm concerned, this is nothing about a financial success and confidence for the entire life and the coming generations, but to the ones who made it to actually be "living the dream".

For the cynics the expression "living the dream" may sound –

•Weary and cheesy

•Phony new age thingy

•A belief of clueless people who are only looking to escape from reality

•There is really no such a thing

And you may complete the rest. I'm sure to come back to this topic in one of the next posts.

Hey there! Stop for a sec!

In the recent years, I have made for "stops" than usual (as related to me and to others), in order to observe inside and outside, examining whether I was doing the right thing for me. I have definively never been hundred percent sure, but I learnt how to rely more and more on my instincts. I feel that these stops, while some of my acquaintants viewed as -

•Self delaying

•A waste of time

•Indecision

•(Mental) instability

Which caused them worrying and frustration regarding me, these stops have actually provided me with the opportunity to look inside and outside; the opportunity to observe the inside, and that go outside again, to the open world and ask or enquire as to what the world can really offer me.

Mentors

By accident (or not), in this period I found real friends, who don't judge, and even if I have never used this term with regard to them, before, they were, and still are, my mentors.

The view from the rooftop of the building

where I live in Chiang Mai

These stops introduced me to the right people who have been there, listening to my real and inner voice; while others were speaking with that conformist worried voice which tried to have me back in the groove, understand what went wrong with me, and what I should do differently in order to this and that… these non-judging friends talk with me from a place of freedom, non judgmental.

I reckon that mentors are of great importance to life, and the sooner you find them, the faster you will know how to go on your own path, because they will help you see it more clearly, beyond your fears.

What in my opinion makes one a mentor? Here are some examples:

They –

•Come from a place of freedom

•Are actually there, present, with you

•L-i-s-t-e-n to you

•Are not afraid to tell you the truth regarding what they really think About you and your issues

•Are not afraid of your responses to what they say about you

•Know to put the finger on the "real you", more that others would do.

What is a mentor for you?

Living the dream vs. Dreaming Life

My philosophy says that there is not one dream, but rather many small dreams, which in a certain aspect, can be merged into one dream (you may call them mini-dreams, sub-dreams, etc.). These are just a few examples for small dreams for me:

•        Independence

•        Financial Independence

•        Mobility

•        Good, tasty health food (prefereably vegan)

•        The freedom to be spontaneous

•        The freedom to love

•        The freedom or ability to express myself as I am, including emotions and sensations, first when facing myself; then, when facing others

•        More to come

You are welcome to add some of yours.

In the next post…

I will continue with a similar line of discussing about the things which are taking me to the place (physical and spiritual) which I am now.

Chinese friends and myself in the Burmese

restaurant in Chiang Mai

I will be more than happy to hear your opinion on this post – regarding the content the attitude of writing, and some of your own stories, if you are willing to share.

If you liked this post, you are likely to be interested in these 10 steps as to how to live your dream.

If you share this post, blessed be you.